


reading between the lines

by wartransmission



Category: Free!
Genre: College, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-10
Updated: 2014-03-10
Packaged: 2018-01-15 06:54:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1295593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wartransmission/pseuds/wartransmission
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Haru wonders if it would make a difference if he saw Makoto the same way that other people saw him. He wonders if it would change anything if he saw Makoto's smiles as beautiful things, even though they're already so familiar to him that all he thinks is "Makoto" at the sight of them instead of "beautiful."</p>
            </blockquote>





	reading between the lines

Sometimes, Haru wonders if he should do more, or say more. He's still not used to this 'affectionate' business. He's no Makoto or Nagisa, after all.

 

He wonders if there's something wrong with staying silent. Even Makoto's admirers, who are girls that Makoto doesn't even know at times, are more open to appreciating him. Him, with his gentle gaze, kind smile, and beautiful figure- Haru wonders if there's something wrong with not saying anything about those things. He appreciates Makoto on the whole, certainly, perhaps far more than those people who said they liked him, and yet he can't say anything aloud about those little details. How Makoto always scratches at his cheek when he's embarrassed or happy about something and he doesn't want to be too open about it, how his smiles are even happier when Haru smiles back at him, how his hands are perfectly carved to fit around Haru's own; Haru appreciates all of it. But is there really a need to say those sorts of things out loud?

 

"Haru?" Makoto calls to him and he turns his gaze to his right, where Makoto is wearing an amused smile because of him. "You were spacing out. The squid will burn if you ignore it like that, you know."

 

"I know that," Haru grumbles, annoyed at being caught while he was ruminating on how things should be, considering how he's still with Makoto despite how they've already left Iwatobi. It's Makoto's fault that he was caught up in his thoughts, anyway. "Don't bother me."

 

"I was just making sure that you wouldn't burn the squid, you don't have to be so mean, Haru," Makoto whines in that playful way of his. He smiles happily when Haru turns to raise an eyebrow at him. "What were you thinking about, though? You were really deep in thought."

 

He's still smiling when he asks as much. Haru sighs, turning his gaze back to the grill as he watches the squid slowly curl in on itself from the heat. Makoto already knows, so why must he play this stupid game with him? To think that someone so big could be so childish. "I was thinking of the last letter you were given, back when we were in our third year."

 

"Oh? The one from Rika-chan?" Makoto asks with a surprised blink of his eyes. He laughs sheepishly when Haru turns a narrow-eyed gaze his way. "It's hard to forget, alright? She was very... _eager_  with her confession, so it's kind of difficult to forget who she was. Still," he sighs as he scratches at his cheek, "why were you thinking of that, Haru?"

 

"I was thinking of how much it embarrassed you," Haru lies, though it's a close enough truth. Rika's honesty on how she felt about Makoto certainly earned her a place in Makoto's memories, considering how conservative he still is with various things. The notion that a girl would be so honest with her feelings, with expressing her appreciation of his face and his figure and his personality, was still so new to him then. It still is, in a way. Haru is certain that Makoto would get just as flustered if the same thing happened to him again, now that they're in college. It's only a matter of time, really, considering how different Tokyo is from Iwatobi.

 

It happens in the rarest of times that Haru, being bored and stuck in the dorm he shares with Makoto, starts to wonder how it would be like if he felt the same way as those girls did. Would it make a difference if he thought Makoto's smile was beautiful? Would it be so different if he agreed with them that Makoto's figure was perfect?

 

He takes a peek at Makoto, who gives him a disbelieving look because of his previous reply. It's a look that Haru is familiar with, considering how often he troubles Makoto with his need to be in the water. He sighs, shakes his head, before flipping the squid over on the grill.

 

He just can't see him in the same way that they do. He appreciates Makoto, he honestly does, but he doesn't see the appeal in waxing poetic about his abdominal muscles or his 'gorgeous' smile. Makoto is Makoto, and nothing else. He's fine with how they are now.

 

"Does Haru think I should've said yes to Rika-chan?" Makoto asks, a teasing undertone to his words as he turns to lean back against the kitchen counter. "She was really cute, wasn't she?" His smile is far too mischievous to be anything but innocent, and Haru feels his eye twitch a bit. It's a sure thing that Makoto is kind and gentle, but he also has a sly side to him that Haru would really, _really_ rather not deal with- and yet, he's the only one unfortunate enough to have spent so long a time with Makoto to be privileged with this side of him.

 

Haru glares down at the grilled squid. Why did he choose to stick with this sort of person, who could always find a way to get on his nerves without even trying? "No," he says point-blank, ignoring the heat on his cheeks as he moves the grilled squid from the grill onto a plate.

 

Makoto laughs. "Sorry, Haru. I guess I'm just bothering you after all." He smiles a chipper smile, not at all looking like he intends to leave despite how he'd just apologized for being a bother. Or was he apologizing because he intended to be a bother for longer? He definitely understood what Haru meant when he said no, though it would seem that he's still not satisfied with that. Haru feels the corner of his lips twitch into a frown, though he stifles it quickly enough before Makoto can notice.

 

Attention. He's sure that Makoto's doing it to keep Haru's attention on him.

 

How annoying.

 

"I'm not troubled with anything," he grumbles under his breath as he turns off the stove. "So stop bothering me while I'm cooking."

 

"You're already done with cooking, though," Makoto informs him helpfully, though the sheepish smile on his face and the fact that he doesn't deny the first portion of what Haru said confirms Haru's presumptions. This is one reason why he thinks being with Makoto annoying, though in a way, he does appreciate it. Makoto has always been too much of a busybody. (It's good at times, considering how he _did_ meet everyone else in their group because of Makoto pushing him into joining the swim club in elementary school.)

 

"I was just thinking," he says, trying to be casual as he sets the grill aside and hands over the plate of grilled squid to Makoto. "People are usually affectionate with the people they love."

 

"That's a given," Makoto agrees with an amused smile, ending up laughing when Haru turns to squint at him. "But different people use different ways to show their love, Haru. Anyone would feel really loved to get even a word of appreciation from you, because it's something special that you don't give away just like that."

 

"...I see," Haru says, slowly nodding to himself as he unties his apron from the back and folds it up to put it back into the drawer he got it from. It did make sense. Giving his affection away in such a carefree way would make it mean less than it did, didn't it? So he's fine as he is.

 

"Still, being told that I'm loved would be fine once in a while too," Makoto implies without once looking Haru's way. Haru stifles a snort of amusement at the obvious suggestion as he fills up two bowls of rice. Makoto continues, not looking at all like he's expecting Haru to play along with his whims, "Then, am I right to think that Haru thought about those sorts of things because Rika-chan was very verbal about her appreciation of me?"

 

Haru offers a grunt in response as he sits on one end of the table, looking up to the sight of Makoto smiling knowingly at him as he sits on the other end. He says, "Haru is Haru, and I like you just as you are. It'd be really embarrassing if you suddenly started talking about me like that too, so." His smile brightens as he pushes the plate of grilled squid to the center of the table. "I'm fine with this, Haru. Really."

 

"Mm," Haru hums in understanding, accepting that Makoto means what he says. It's true that he'd be doubly embarrassed if Haru were the one to compliment him openly like that. It's a bit tempting, but...maybe, some other time. Just when Makoto won't expect it.

 

For now, simple words should be enough.

 

"Makoto," Haru says just after they've both said their thanks, easily getting Makoto's attention as they look up at each other at the same time. Makoto offers him a confused smile as he lowers his chopsticks for a moment. Haru says, firm in his countenance, "I'll cook green curry for dinner later."

 

Makoto blinks at those words, surprised for a moment at what seemed to be a non sequitur, before gradually letting a warm smile show on his face. There are hints of pink on his cheeks when he hides a laugh under his clenched hand and Haru is reminded of how easy it is, being with Makoto like this, even though they were in a world that was still so novel to the both of them.

 

Haru swallows, trying to wet his dry throat when Makoto sends an affectionate smile his way. Makoto says, the words innocent enough while still being laden with meaning, "I'd really like that, Haru."

 

He understood, after all.


End file.
